Roundtable Talk #14: Game Franchises We Just Don’t Care For

We love videogames. Clearly. We even created an entire website based around it. But that doesn’t mean we love all videogames. Despite how popular a franchise is, how many entries it receives and awards it wins, sometimes they just don’t connect. That’s okay; not every franchise is a perfect fit for every person. So once again the staff of Controller Crusade gathered together (metaphorically) and discussed the franchises that we just don’t care for.

Allison’s Pick: Call of Duty

Listen, I’ll be the first to tell you that FPS games are not my cup of tea. I get bored using the same game mechanic repeatedly, regardless of how many weapon options I have. Sure, I have fond memories playing Halo and Borderlands, and I can mosey my way through town in Red Dead Redemption 2 just fine. But no FPS game bores me to tears quite like the Call of Duty franchise.

This isn’t necessarily a “hot take” – Call of Duty has received negative reviews since it first hit shelves in 2003. I’ve tried to see the appeal while playing with friends and even by myself, but I simply can’t get invested. I fully appreciate that, sometimes, you just want to play a “cops and robbers” shoot-em-up. There’s nothing wrong with that. But, often, this “game” feels like a war simulator, offering no actual character development or emotional ethos other than the constant death and chaos happening around you. Plus, it’s so chronically dull that these unfortunate circumstances don’t even feel justified.

I understand that this game captures nostalgia for many players or allows them to hang out with their friends, but I beg you to expand your borders beyond just this franchise alone. There are so many engaging, beautifully crafted FPS games that pull on heartstrings much more than Call of Duty.

George’s Pick: Dark Souls

Now, I know this might be controversial, but I think Dark Souls is overrated. There. I said it. Why, you ask? Well, I really enjoyed playing the Demon’s Souls remake. So, once I had finished it (twice might I add), I ordered the Dark Souls trilogy and eagerly loaded the first game. And the first boss was essentially the same as the one in the tutorial for Demon’s Souls. I told myself that it was the tutorial, so what? I made it past the tutorial area and to the first area. I went to fight one of the easier enemies brandishing a knife, and it lunged at me. It lunged at me like enemies with a similar design did in Demon’s Souls. And, for me personally, that sucked.

I was hoping for a completely new experience when playing Darks Souls. What I found was something that felt like more of the same. I’m not saying that these aren’t good games. Just that Dark Souls personally did not do enough to separate itself from Demon’s Souls for me. To me, the game was just another obstacle course dressed in a different way. I have one last point that is highly subjective: the games demand too much time for them to be similar. Anyone can beat a souls game if they put in the time necessary. However, I don’t want to go through that process multiple times for an experience I do not believe does enough different things. That is why I think the Dark Souls trilogy is overrated.

Justin’s Pick: Kingdom Hearts

Kingdom Hearts. Ugh.

I just don’t get it, man.

Look, I love Final Fantasy. I’m quite fond of Disney. I don’t like fanfiction. And to me, that’s all KH is. It reminds me of a crazy crossover fanfiction series you’d once find hidden in the depths of Tumblr. Running around Agrabah with characters from your favourite franchises and some ridiculous original characters with too many zippers just isn’t what I’m looking for from a videogame.

If you think I’m judging a game by it’s cover, you are absolutely right. But not just the cover, I don’t like what’s in the game either. A sword that’s actually a key, a story that weaves in and out of multiple games, names like HeartlessNoHeartNobodyHeartKingdomHeart? If this series were a person, it would sit on a rooftop proudly proclaiming “I’m 13 years old and I’m realllllly into Hot Topic”.

And can we talk about the titles? Kingdom Hearts HD 2.8 Final Chapter Prologue? Fuck off.

I don’t know. I usually love games that have a singular, weird vision. I love Jet Set Radio, so clearly holding style above everything else doesn’t bother me. Hell, The World Ends With You is one of my favourite RPGs, and that’s basically the same aesthetic as Kingdom Hearts. It’s just the way that KH puts it all together that triggers a visceral reaction in my monkey brain, like every single thing was designed to be almost exactly what I’m looking for, but twisted just enough that I end up angry instead of excited. I’m glad other people enjoy it, but I’ve never seen another franchise where every single thing about turns me off of it.

Josh’s Pick: Assassin’s Creed

Let me just start off by saying I love the Assassin’s Creed franchise on paper, but in reality, it has taken a direction that I feel is what is wrong with the AAA gaming space today. What began as a series where each game can be completed in roughly 20 hours has transformed into games that are so long for the sake of being long, and at this stage of my life I just don’t have the time or ambition to finish them.

For every AC release I usually wait until the price drops, with the exception of Valhalla, which I bought as my Series X launch game, and every time I have the lofty goal of seeing them through to the end. Howlongtobeat.com, an excellent website for tracking approximately how long it will take you to complete almost any game, currently has Assassin’s Creed Valhalla sitting at 56 ½ hours to complete just the main story with no side exploration, which is about 20-25 hours too much in my opinion.

Ubisoft, please take a page out of Sucker Punch’s book and model your next Assassin’s Creed title after a game that has clearly perfected your own formula, Ghost of Tsushima. With a 25 hour main story and plenty of side content for those who wish to seek it out, Ghost of Tsushima was the AC game I always wanted, and I would love to return to the Assassin’s Creed universe in the future with a much more focused, condensed gameplay experience.

So there you have it. The 4 videogame juggernaut franchises that we just can’t seem to wrap our heads around. You know the drill. Tell us what franchises you don’t like. Or just tell how wrong we are about Kindgom Hearts (even though we aren’t).